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Saturday 26 October 2024

Nature calling with impatient urgency

The thought is already daunting

Going beyond my local corner shop was a daunting prospect, the thought of getting into town without the encumbrance of Saturday traffic and the elements of Halloween clawing away at everyone’s sensibilities.

This was my first determined foray from home, besides my almost forgotten hospital visits and my Sunday church attendance. I needed to do some shopping, and I wondered if I had the wherewithal to complete that activity.

I had to plan my journey, and I was already wearied at the thought of a 25-minute walk when I happened on the idea of using the tram to take about 18 minutes either way out of that strenuous workout. That is what it has become, even without the fatigue, it was just the strength to perform that was lacking.

Just Can’t Wait

Barely had I reached the tram stop and I was looking for a public convenience, an urgent call of nature creating a burning sensation from my bladder into my urinary tract. I had to choose between the public toilets in the library or the town hall annexe. I chose the latter because I won’t need to navigate stairs and doors, it was a bit further along too.

As I reached for my Radar key to access the disabled toilets, the attendant was at the ready, and he opened the door for me. What seemed like a relief was first painful, burning, and unpleasant, accompanied by straining to the point of getting herniated, and then a weak hot stream, but not with the comfort of completely emptying my bladder. A bit of massaging of intimate parts and rocking from foot to foot, then another slightly pleasant stream, with a feeling of being almost done.

Nature is a taskmaster

I was comfortable enough to continue my journey, returning to the tram stop, I boarded the tram to the city shopping centre and did the first part of my shopping at Aldi. Nature intervened before I could get to M&S, so, I was off to the public toilets again, having to wait for a disabled toilet to be vacated and the routine replayed itself like just 30 minutes before.

To think I was that long at M&S getting a few cartons of juice, a milkshake and some ready meals, I knew I was not going to make it home before the third toilet visit in just over an hour. I found the comforting enclosure of the disabled toilet at Selfridge’s before I began my return journey on the tram.

Within ten minutes of arriving home, we had to do it all again. It seems walking stimulates the bladder, which might become a concern about having accessible toilet facilities once one leaves home. You could be easily dissuaded even if you are equipped with the toilet map, a Radar key, and a Just Can’t Wait card. There is no time for embarrassment or shame, when nature calls, you answer.

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