Thought Picnic: How do you lose your virginity?

Sex before time

There are some things it would take another life to have, a life where all the good knowledge and wisdom one has would have to be readily accessible at birth, but I do not believe in reincarnation, the life I have is the one I am living already.

Sex has always been a fascinating topic from the perspective that I first experienced it when I did not know what it was about and when I finally began to understand what it was about, its uses never found the value that was placed on it.

There have been many ways to explain away the deviations from the norm that have accompanied the loss of innocence on the matter of sex but the fact is, if you are more than sexually aware long before puberty there are many things that affect you just as the sensation of eating unripe fruit.

What is virginity?

That is an analogy rather than a parallel; but this thinking arises from having seen a number of tweets on virginity and I very well commend those who have been able to retain their virginity for all sorts of reasons or at least they have been able to decided when they want to lose theirs.

I write this in the mind of a child who never had a virginity, there is no comprehension of what it means before puberty and once you reach puberty sexual curiosity is hardly what it seems; it is neither exploratory nor gratifying, it probably is an animal passion driven by peer pressure or daring experimentation.

Depending on the level of abuse, there might be an aversion to it completely; a case of being speedily matured and damaged long before one can value what it is all about.

Sparing my children

That part of one’s childhood can make all the difference, the loss of innocence that leads to decisions that are difficult to understand, but I see that there is a part of me that is rational – if in the setting that I grew up in I could not be protected from predators, what chance have I having my own children protected from predators of another generation?

Indeed, there are aspects of the life I have lived that I would hate for any possible children of mine to experience and so I have had no children, the likelihood that I could ever have any was remote for a long time (there are studies that suggest pre-term babies do not generally go on to have children in adulthood), the possibility became less evident as time progressed and well after chemotherapy, we might well have reached the terminus.

All that just makes a simple story long, the question is how do you lose your virginity if you never had one?