The cues are always clear
Taking a hint is
probably something we get to learn over time and understanding the situations
and people we are with. What we probably do not want to exhaust in not
realising the best way to react, is the patience and the tolerance of the people
we care for.
There are times
people just want to be left alone to be consumed in their thoughts, they do not
want to talk, they do not want to be pitied, and most importantly, in their
vulnerability, that is not what they want to be told of even if that is the
truth.
That is the hint, to step away, to give way and to give time; do not make assumptions or place encumbrances
of time or place on the person, for the crossover from concern to infuriating
is thinner than a gossamer film.
Don’t flood the ears
In other cases,
silence is more considerate than trying to find words to express anything that
might suggest that you know how the other feels when you are entirely clueless.
We can all have the completely same circumstances to relate to and yet find out
that how it affects others will never ever be the same. It is a common mistake to
even offer the idea that you know how they feel, even if you had cancer compared
to the discomfort of their headache.
Space is a premium,
people need lots of it at certain times and when that space is asked for, do not
wait to asked again, make way, and patiently wait to be invited back into that
space that you probably know by right you occupy but have to let go of, just to
help the other manage their turmoil better.
It is respectful too
I guess there are no
lessons on taking the hint, but if for whatever reason it is not learnt well,
more than a breakdown is in store. Everything you notice does not need to be voiced,
backing off serves more than stepping completely in.
Stop talking, start
listening, there is no need to affirm or reiterate anything, let your silence
become a better counsel. In it, you inadvertently show respect for the other
person and ultimately, it will be more than appreciated. It is probably what
helps any kind of relationship work too before anyone is forced to walk out
slamming the doors behind themselves.
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