Men's things - XIV

With the passage of time

It has been over two weeks since I was last at The Christie to discuss the radiotherapy option for treating prostate cancer. From my previous Men’s things blog, we had a disputation even as the information was coming in faster than I could fully process what I was being told.

Much as I have much information to read up on to appreciate the options on the table, the post-operative consequences of a prostatectomy did not offer me any comfort beyond the knowledge if I had the inclination that the prostate will be totally removed along with the possibility that the end result could be total irreversible impotence.

That probably does not bother me as much as the loss of bladder control which could last anything from 3 to 6 months or more. As I am quite an active person, this could lead to a rather diminished quality of life as I try to cope with the issues involved. Besides, as this procedure is conducted under general anaesthetic, you will not have the option to consult or interfere in any consequential surgical activity.

Just the thought that you might after waking up from anaesthesia be told the good news that the operation was successful and then the other news that you will no more be the man you once were could be a terrifying prospect that in my good mind I felt was not what I wanted to be visited with.

From the foregoing to decision time

I had a long conversation with my Holistic Needs Assessment nurse from the Macmillan Cancer Support charity discussing the issues and concerns I had. We both agreed that the surgical route is not the best treatment option towards long-term recovery.

While at my consultation I had disagreements about my not being considered for brachytherapy, I can now decide even if predicated on subjective data rather than medical analysis, I have enough information to understand the reasoning.

The Digital Rectal Examination had first determined that my prostate was enlarged and the multiparametric MRI with contrast not only showed the lesions on the right side, but also the noticeable inflammation on the left side.

No need for further tests

On the basis of this, the surgeon could not guarantee that he would be able to save the nerves that manage the erectile process because the inflammation might have made it too difficult or impossible to peel away the nerves to extricate the prostate gland. The risk was he had to be in there to decide, there was no other way to be sure.

Taking that forward to how my urination is affected on the I-PSS sheet, brachytherapy could further inflame the prostate leading to a medical emergency if my urethra is totally closed off. The other forms of external radiotherapy do not present as much of a risk of closing off the urethra and would be a lot more tolerable. The ensuing side effects of radiotherapy, unpleasant as it might be, can be adequately managed.

It goes without saying that radiotherapy would be my choice and I should have the opportunity to convey my decision to the hospital soon. I expected a call on Friday, it might be sometime next week.

Now to talk to other people

Another thing I need to do is have conversations with other men who have been through this experience. So far, I am acquainted with second-hand information about this. A friend of a friend on the radiotherapy track undergoing hormone therapy first, which I have been told, I would not need.

A man of the cloth who has since retired who took elective surgery, and the father of a colleague who had the lower dose radiotherapy treatment over 20 sessions and what I gleaned from that snippet, it was every weekday for 20 days with a duration of about 30 minutes.

Also, one other kind of experience I should find is someone who was verifiably diagnosed with prostate cancer and was healed by faith and prayer, medical science then certifying the total disappearance of cancer and a fully improved health status of the person healed.

The cancer does not belong here

I am coming to terms with the fact that this needs to be addressed and done with alacrity. I maintain a sense of assuredness, that the outcomes would be the best for my circumstances, my health, and my future. I do not have prostate cancer, rather, it has been medically determined a foreign situation exists in my body that must and will be removed.

I refuse to give it any comfort or respite to claim territory within me, like you eject a squatter on your property by any means possible, this one too must go.

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